Chapter 356

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Chapter 356: The Bad Woman in the Nightmare

"Marshal Bai, congratulations on your victorious return and for avenging me against the rebels."

"From today onwards, I am the true supreme ruler."

"Tonight, we won’t return until we are drunk."

"Let’s count, it has been more than ten cycles of seasons since that year… At that time, I was just a foolish little girl, almost dying from poison. If it weren’t for your loyalty, leading me to escape…"

"Yes, let’s not talk about the past. What’s important is that we have avenged our enemies from that year. The ones who deserved to be killed have all been killed. I am still the legitimate royal family."

"Drinking, this is what I have been searching for for a long time… Just like the taste of the first drink you shared with me when I came of age, it’s exactly the same."

"Are you drunk?"

"I am also a little drunk."

"I’m sorry, Bai Wei, I have to apologize to you… The wine wasn’t poisoned, maybe I should have poisoned it."

"What do you think I want to talk to you about? Using a toast to give up your power?"

"If it were possible, I would also like to, but you have killed too many people. If you don’t die, the noble families won’t support me."

"It was indeed a play at first, but it gradually became something else. I issued eighteen golden orders, but couldn’t bring you back. You insisted on starting a war to destroy a country… I don’t really know if it’s genuine anger or fake anger… I remember everything you taught me in the past, but unfortunately, it doesn’t apply to this era. This world still belongs to the noble families. If you kill everyone, I will cease to exist as well."

"You really have to die, and I have to kill you. I realized this a long time ago, and now I feel relieved."

"You have helped me so many times, this is the last favor I’m asking of you."

"Take your own life and help me stabilize this land… It’s for the sake of the common people."

"Do you find it strange why I am so heartless, yet I apologize to you? What am I apologizing for?"

"What I apologize for is not allowing you to have a child. It is my selfishness because I cannot allow you to belong to anyone else. You are mine, and I can no longer tolerate you."

"Or to put it simply, I’m losing you."

"I want you to stay forever and ever, but that’s impossible. Time can be so cruel. The last time I saw you was fifteen months ago."

"I no longer trust you."

"Just end it, Bai Wei. When you’re gone, everyone around you can have a good ending…"

The grand marshal of the nation’s army remained silent.

Finally, the cold and even mocking look in the eyes of the empress was the only thing left.

He looked at this scheming manipulator who didn’t dare to dirty her own hands. He threw down his dagger, turned around, and headed straight for the Golden Throne Hall. He drew his sword and killed, killing corrupt courtiers and traitors until there were none left. Finally, he walked into the rain of arrows and perished at dawn.

…

After a long time, I had another nightmare.

Bai Wei dreamt of the past memories of his 59th life.

He opened his eyes, looked at the dawn outside the window, sat up, tapped his face, and chuckled at himself.

"I thought I had forgotten everything, but it always lingers in my dreams."

Not every generation clears its memories.

Unless it is extremely painful, he generally doesn’t choose to erase his memories.

Bai Wei’s 59th life lasted less than twenty years, not very long. Moreover, most of the time during the next ten years was spent in war, so there was hardly any sense of time passing.

The memories of this generation have gradually faded. If there is any lasting impression, it is probably the dramatic fact that his own daughter, whom he raised, betrayed him.

"To hell with trust… to hell with love…" Bai Wei muttered.

He understood that this situation was actually an exception, but it still hurt him deeply.

Many times in secret, he cursed himself for being a follower and wished he had returned to the court earlier to crush her. He could have even become the emperor himself.

But now, thinking like this doesn’t mean he thought like this back then. In his heart, he was filled with nothing but sadness, to the point that he didn’t even consider killing her.

Because the wounds were too deep.

In this lifetime, Bai Wei can actually be understood as him healing his psychological trauma.

Becoming a scholar, Bai Wei discovered that as long as he watched as an outsider and didn’t participate, the world became beautiful.

Humans have the ability to empathize, so there’s no need to personally experience it. Just by reading about love stories, one can feel happy. Watching others being loving and affectionate also improves one’s mood… In this way, Bai Wei’s psychological trauma has been healed quite a bit. He hasn’t dreamt of those things for a long time. However, last night when Diwu Qiansui appeared, he had a nightmare. Some triggers bring back old fears. Psychological shadows don’t reason with you.

Psychological problems are even more difficult to solve than physical problems. Some people develop symptoms thinking they have a certain illness, and end up experiencing similar symptoms.

Bai Wei’s chosen method was to "fuck love." He declined any marriage arrangements, even though he knew the young girl. She was known in Lin’an as a talented woman. He also politely declined all matchmaking attempts. He went out alone, taking walks every few days, and even after turning twenty, he remained single.

He didn’t hinder others, nor did he let others hinder him.

When I have nothing to do, I like to go to the government office in Kaifeng to find some cases to help out, or I’ll go on adventures, or maybe I’ll go have tea with Fa HaiXu Xian. Life is quite comfortable.

In this modest era, Bai Wei politely declined once, and the other girls wouldn’t come again, even if they were interested.

Unfortunately, Diwu Qiansui had the courage to squat at his doorstep, which gave Bai Wei a headache.

To consider his mental health, when he left in the morning, he warned her that she had to leave.

Miss Qiansui indeed went out obediently, but when Bai Wei came back at night, she was still squatting at the door and speaking earnestly.

"You said I had to leave, but you didn’t say I couldn’t come back."

Bai Wei didn’t buy into it and wanted to send her to an inn to stay. After leaving her at the inn, he returned later, but she was still squatting outside the door.

When he let her in, she smiled happily as if she didn’t care about the typical reserved manners of a lady. She clung to Bai Wei and talked to him.

The young man wanted her to be quiet, so she stayed silent for half an hour, just staring with her eyes wide open.

That night, Bai Wei had another bad dream.

The bad dream was quite cozy.

The cozy dream made Bai Wei feel nauseous when he woke up. He felt sick for the whole morning.

He left without saying hello and just wanted to stay away from Diwu Qiansui. Thinking that she might not be human, he went up the mountain to find Fa Hai and asked to stay at the Golden Mount Temple for a few days.

Fa Hai said it was no problem and then went on a business trip to Lingyin Temple for a meeting the next day. Before leaving, he said to Bai Wei, "You can sleep in my room tonight."

Bai Wei asked if he could go together.

Fa Hai said no.

Bai Wei said he had profound knowledge of Buddhism and was a natural Buddhist.

Fa Hai said he was concerned about Bai Wei’s safety. With Bai Wei’s ability to mock and ridicule me and the power of several golden-body Arhats, I won’t be able to stop them from attacking you.

Bai Wei slept in Fa Hai’s room that night, feeling protected by something left by this monk, and had a peaceful sleep.

The next morning, while brushing his teeth, he met Diwu Qiansui, who looked fresh and clean.

The pretty girl greeted him and asked, "Good morning! Are you also here for the overnight vegetarian meal?"

Bai Wei nodded stiffly and said, "What a coincidence."

Later, he asked the little novice monk and found out that Diwu Qiansui had stayed overnight and slept in the guest room next to Bai Wei’s room. It was the same room Bai Wei had stayed in the night before, and he hadn’t even had a chance to tidy it up. But Diwu Qiansui said she didn’t mind.

Bai Wei skipped breakfast and went straight back to Lin’an.

For the next week, he played hide-and-seek with Diwu Qiansui. No matter where he hid, she always managed to find him.

In the end, he gave up and decided to go back home. In the evening, he peeked outside and sure enough, Diwu Qiansui was sitting right by his doorstep, playing with a black cat.

Bai Wei had dark circles under his eyes and hadn’t had a good sleep for a long time. He always had nightmares at night, from dreams of Seven Kingdoms battling each other to stories of the Three Kingdoms. He was either Emperor Zhou or Emperor Han, constantly being held hostage and mentally exhausted.

He couldn’t help but ask if Diwu Qiansui could come back in a few days, so he could get a good sleep.

Qiansui asked with confusion, "I behaved well at night, didn’t do anything wrong."

The next day, she really didn’t come.

The third day, she still didn’t come.

The fourth day, she still didn’t come.

Bai Wei pretended not to care, but wherever he went, people asked him why Miss Diwu wasn’t there. They wondered if they had an argument or if they needed any advice. Without a beautiful girl by his side, Bai Wei became distracted in his recent actions. He couldn’t focus on reading or martial arts. Bai Wei felt annoyed and looked down on himself. He spent the entire night with a clear mind, then went for a night stroll around West Lake. He also caught a few carefree thieves. After completing these tasks, he felt like himself again. This was the real him.

One evening, there was a girl sitting at the doorstep, with bright eyes, a radiant smile.

Bai Wei："…"

That night, he didn’t have any more nightmares.