A Word To Heaven

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Xu Yan was indeed quite helpless, because this person who was “traveling the same route” as him not only shared his meals and drinks, but even followed him to the latrine—they were practically inseparable.

‘This wasn’t traveling the same route at all—it was clearly surveillance.’

“Brother, you’re new here. We have rules at Yuan Mountain Stronghold—every new brother gets a fellow traveler. Don’t worry, after three months, I won’t be traveling your route anymore.” The thin-browed, long-eyed bandit spread his hands and said, “You think I enjoy smelling latrine stench? Orders from above, can’t help it. Just bear with it.”

The bandit Yuan Mountain Stronghold sent to monitor Xu Yan was named Zhang He, appearing to be in his twenties but not yet thirty, responsible for the kitchen area.

In the stronghold, there was no distinction between head chef and prep cook—the kitchen only had a few cooks anyway. When mealtime came, everyone pitched in together. The three leaders’ food had to be prepared with care, but for the other bandits, it was whatever—the easier the better, not much different from feeding pigs.

Assigning a cook to monitor Xu Yan wasn’t because Yuan Mountain Stronghold specially allocated someone to take care of this little Taoist priest’s meals, but because Xu Yan had been assigned to the kitchen to do odd jobs.

“The latrine is a place of filth. Filth attracts evil spirits, and staying long in such places harms the spirit. We Taoists don’t recommend lingering in latrines. It’s best to finish your business within a quarter hour—any longer not only affects one’s soul but also easily causes sores.”

Squatting in the latrine, Xu Yan explained Taoist health principles to Zhang He, whose face was full of suffering beside him. Whether from anger or the stench, Zhang He nearly choked to death holding his breath.

Pinching his nose, Zhang He said helplessly, “Even pigs don’t like coming to latrines—no need for your reminder. Hurry up, I’m about to be fumigated to death. It’s almost mealtime, we’re having dumplings today. You just need to wrap them.”

Yuan Mountain Stronghold was quite large. The three leaders lived in three separate courtyards not far from each other. Though called courtyards, they were just enclosed by a single layer of fencing, and the stronghold’s perimeter walls made of bamboo fencing looked even more shabby.

It wasn’t that these bandits were poor. Since establishing themselves as mountain kings five years ago, the Yuan Mountain bandit menace had become notorious throughout the surrounding villages. Countless wealthy families had fallen to them.

The stronghold was so crude because they never stayed in one place too long. The current stronghold had just been moved here at the beginning of the year—the previous Yuan Mountain Stronghold was more than thirty li of mountain roads away from here.

Qi Yuan Mountain wasn’t a single mountain, but a continuous mountain range.

This branch of the Wanheng Mountain Range stretched hundreds of li from north to south. On the other side of this mountain range, tens of thousands of Great Pu border troops were stationed. Though Liao Jiuming claimed not to fear the Western Pacification Army’s reputation, in reality, ever since coming to Qi Yuan Mountain, he had been constantly on guard against the border army’s movements.

He wasn’t afraid of ordinary constables and government troops, but if the border army really came to suppress them, he would immediately flee. That’s why Yuan Mountain Stronghold’s construction remained crude, and they changed locations every year or two.

Yuan Mountain Stronghold’s kitchen was at the very back of the stronghold, with mountain forest beyond. Being assigned here, Xu Yan had found himself a quiet place.

But quiet places were often places of trouble too.

The day’s haul had been quite good, so the leaders decided to celebrate. They distributed dozens of jars of strong liquor and ordered the kitchen to prepare some good food to properly reward their brothers.

Good food naturally meant dumplings. More than ten cooks had been busy for half the day, and steaming basins of dumplings were sent throughout the stronghold. In the kitchen, Xu Yan, sweating profusely from exhaustion, clumsily pinched dumplings together. While others wrapped five or six, he hadn’t even finished one, getting flour all over his head and face.

“Kid, never eaten dumplings before? You’re wrapping them so slowly.” The burly fat cook glanced at the little Taoist priest and sneered, “Is your Taoist temple too poor to afford meat?”

“Can monks even eat meat? Kid, did your parents sell you to the Taoist temple? Don’t worry, now that you’re at our Yuan Mountain Stronghold, as long as you can hold a blade, you’ll have meat to eat and wine to drink!”

Another tall, thin cook chopped filling while teasing from the side—clang, clang, clang—his knife work was quite good.

“I, I don’t have parents. Master found me by the river.” Xu Yan said somewhat shyly, his voice not loud.

“So you’re a bastard.” The fat cook cursed, kneading a ball of white dough rapidly. “Being a bastard is good—if the world doesn’t want you, you kill everyone in the world. That’s how you get satisfaction. Understand, kid? Anyone who displeases you, one slash down, and they’ll be crying for daddy and mommy.”

“Boss Wu is right—one slash down and they’ll be crying for their parents, hahaha!” Several cooks burst into laughter, finding it amusing to watch the kitchen boss corrupt this foolish little Taoist priest.

“Kill, killing people gets you meat and wine?” Xu Yan asked timidly. At this moment, a pot of dumplings nearby was ready, and the cooks took turns eating them while they were hot.

They’d sent out most of the food and were hungry themselves.

“In this world, if you don’t kill people, you’re destined for poverty. Eat meat and drink wine? Dream on!” Chef Wu grabbed two dumplings and swallowed them in one bite, saying roughly, “This is a dog-eat-dog world. If you want to survive, fight with a blade!”

The viciousness on his fat face showed the fat cook’s malice. He wanted to completely turn this little Taoist priest into a fierce bandit, because the more people Yuan Mountain Stronghold had, the better their days would be.

“Kill people and you can drink wine, kill people and you can eat meat…” As if truly believing the other’s temptation, Xu Yan’s hands pinching dumplings grew more forceful. He nodded vigorously and said, “I understand now—this world is a man-eating world. To survive, you have to eat human flesh, chop people up, wrap them into dumplings, make them into meat soup, one bite at a time, one bowl at a time!”

Pfft!

A cook who had just taken a sip of dumpling soup spat it out. The others chewing meat filling found it increasingly unpalatable. The more they listened, the more disgusted they became, and two had already spat out all the dumplings in their mouths.

“Are you a pig? I’m teaching you to kill people—who the hell taught you to eat human flesh!”

The fat head cook forced down the dumpling in his mouth despite his nausea and waved his hand, “Go, go, go, get lost. You pig-brain, you’re disgusting me to death.”

Nobody paid much attention to a half-grown kid. After cursing a few times, the cooks started chatting about other things. Some discussed the flower girls in Changning Town’s brothels, others talked about today’s business and the old man’s family who escaped. Nobody connected the flying steel blade and the startled horse.

No wonder—who would think that a teenage Taoist priest could have such precise archery-like skills?

Driven to one side, Xu Yan scratched his head and continued carefully wrapping his dumplings. Zhang He beside him ignored him, busying himself with his own work. Later, seeing that Xu Yan wrapped dumplings slowly but carefully and beautifully, like little ingots, Zhang He picked up the pot of dumplings Xu Yan had made, called out to the fat head cook, and sent them to the three leaders’ courtyards.

The three leaders naturally ate better than the minions. Even if it was all dumplings, they had to pick the best-looking ones to send over.

After half a day of bustle, everyone in Yuan Mountain Stronghold was well-fed and drunk. The kitchen was also allocated a jar of strong liquor, but there was no share for Xu Yan—the fat head cook clutched the wine jar and wouldn’t let anyone else have it.

At Yuan Mountain Stronghold, as long as your fists were big enough, you could lord it over others. There were no rules or order here—only might made right.

At evening, Xu Yan was arranged to stay in Zhang He’s room. Since Zhang He was responsible for monitoring him and was Xu Yan’s fellow traveler, the two couldn’t be separated for three months.

Zhang He’s room wasn’t large, but it was kept clean. Anyway, Xu Yan was small and wouldn’t take up much space sleeping. Still, Zhang He asked worriedly, “You don’t snore when you sleep, do you? I hate people who snore the most.”

“No, no.” Xu Yan quickly waved his hands. “I grind my teeth—I never snore.”