Volume 3 Chapter 7

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Volume 3 Chapter 7: Thoughts

Dongfang Qingling didn’t understand why she found herself here again, just as she didn’t understand why she would always find herself subconsciously tidying Xu Qingfan’s room, even though she had never done such chores before.

She had only intended to take a night walk, lost in her thoughts, but when she stopped, she realized she had somehow ended up in front of Xu Qingfan’s cave dwelling in the rear mountain.

Were her steps beyond her control? Or did she subconsciously want to catch another glimpse of Xu Qingfan, even knowing he wasn’t inside?

Dongfang Qingling first met Xu Qingfan eight years ago during the grand competition within Jiuhua Gate. At that time, Dongfang Qingling was like a proud peacock, beautiful and arrogant, basking in the compliments of her master and fellow sisters. She was somewhat conceited yet took great pride in herself, believing that with her reputation as a genius and the many magical items granted by her master, winning the championship would be a mere trifle.

However, Xu Qingfan’s entry shattered her conceit and pride.

Upon learning her opponent was Xu Qingfan, Dongfang Qingling was unfazed. She had heard that Xu Qingfan had won his previous two matches, but the journeys were incredibly difficult, and his opponents were only junior disciples from the "Yu" generation. In fact, even if her opponents were Feng Qingtian and Jin Qinghan, Dongfang Qingling wouldn’t have cared; she was that conceited at the time.

Yet, upon first seeing Xu Qingfan, Dongfang Qingling was indeed quite surprised.

It was a sunny morning, and Dongfang Qingling followed her master and fellow apprentices to participate in her match that day. She imagined how she would easily defeat her opponent and then walk off the stage with pride amidst the cheers of her fellow apprentices. Although she knew she was already late, she didn’t care, because she understood that the judges wouldn’t blame her due to her master’s reputation.

Then, she saw Xu Qingfan standing quietly on the stage, dressed in plain clothes. His face showed a bit of weariness and an emotion she couldn’t quite identify. He appeared calm and didn’t seem irritated by her tardiness, simply standing there, observing her quietly.

"Why are you wearing such clothes? They look like mourning attire." Dongfang Qingling remembered asking this, intending to wear out Xu Qingfan’s patience while preparing to strike anytime.

"Last night, my senior brother passed away." This was Xu Qingfan’s response, delivered with a calm expression.

"I’m sorry." At that time, Dongfang Qingling failed to see the deep sorrow beneath Xu Qingfan’s calmness, so her apology lacked sincerity.

Then, the match began. At first, it went just as Dongfang Qingling imagined, with her having the upper hand. But when she thought victory was assured, she realized that her Spirit Qi couldn’t be channeled freely. Xu Qingfan then explained that he had mixed her Spirit Qi with some "Dissolving Spiritual Herb." With this "underhanded" tactic, Xu Qingfan defeated Dongfang Qingling.

At that moment, Dongfang Qingling was certain she hated Xu Qingfan, hated him for using devious means to defeat her, for embarrassing her in front of her fellow apprentices, and for shattering her pride and arrogance.

So, during Xu Qingfan’s next match, Dongfang Qingling came to watch, hoping someone else would help her get revenge. Yet, Xu Qingfan’s focus was entirely on his opponent, Nangong Qingshan, without noticing her malicious gaze from the sidelines.

To Dongfang Qingling’s frustration, although the match was thrilling, Xu Qingfan won again. But what surprised her more was that Xu Qingfan, usually so gentlemanly, continued to attack even after Nangong Qingshan had lost the ability to resist, leaving Nangong Qingshan badly injured and his martial skills ruined.

Seeing the scene, Dongfang Qingling was not only shocked but also began to think Xu Qingfan was hypocritical, two-faced, and ruthless. However, when she saw Xu Qingfan standing on the stage sighing sadly after the competition, she couldn’t associate him with "hypocritical" and "ruthless" at all.

Just then, the conversation between two Jiuhua disciples nearby let Dongfang Qingling know about the grudge between Xu Qingfan and Nangong Qingshan. Seeing Xu Qingfan in plain clothes on stage, with a hint of sadness and loss, Dongfang Qingling’s heart inexplicably clenched a little.

Then, as Xu Qingfan walked off the stage, Dongfang Qingling’s feet seemed to move towards him uncontrollably, with a bright smile on her face, as if wanting to cheer Xu Qingfan up.

After a brief conversation, they got to know each other, and Dongfang Qingling watched Xu Qingfan struggle his way to the top four. After a fierce battle, he was defeated by Feng Qingtian. Dongfang Qingling’s emotions rose and fell with Xu Qingfan’s matches, sometimes joyful, sometimes worried.

Watching Xu Qingfan leave the stage with Jin Qinghan’s support, Dongfang Qingling felt a little sad. Yet, seeing Xu Qingfan’s calm expression, she also felt a bit happy.

As the tournament ended, Dongfang Qingling suddenly developed an interest in rare plants and would sometimes go to the back mountain to discuss them with Xu Qingfan. Her excuse was to learn Xu Qingfan’s "The Formula of Wither and Flourish," even though her abilities were more suited to learning water techniques.

Gradually, her relationship with Xu Qingfan became more familiar, and their conversations extended beyond rare plants, to include discussions about their pasts, presents, and futures.

Sometimes Dongfang Qingling wondered why she shared these things with Xu Qingfan, as there were subjects she hadn’t even discussed with her elder martial sisters. Perhaps Xu Qingfan’s calm and gentle demeanor, paired with his kind smile, made her feel comfortable and at ease.

But Dongfang Qingling was also a cultivator, meaning she inevitably had to spend most of her time practicing. Her master, though very fond of her, never relaxed his expectations in training. Xu Qingfan never sought her out, so she could only visit him every two to three months, and sometimes Xu Qingfan was in seclusion, making their meetings even less frequent.

It was because it was so rare that Dongfang Qingling looked forward to it even more.

But one day seven months ago, when she went to the back mountain again, she discovered Xu Qingfan was no longer there, and his once tidy house was now covered in dust. After asking Li Yuhan, Dongfang Qingling learned that Xu Qingfan had left the mountain three months ago. This made Dongfang Qingling feel a bit uncomfortable, as she thought Xu Qingfan leaving without telling her meant she was not important to him. Yet, she realized Xu Qingfan had no reason to notify her since they were just friends who met every few months. This realization made her feel even more uneasy.

Since then, Dongfang Qingling would visit the back mountain every month to help clean Xu Qingfan’s room, even though she rarely cleaned her own. She felt that Xu Qingfan’s place had always been spotless whenever she visited, and now seeing it dusty was unfamiliar to her.

Perhaps, she thought, only when the room is tidy could she feel the familiar presence of Xu Qingfan.

Today, Dongfang Qingling heard from Li Yuhan that Xu Qingfan had returned, and she felt a moment of joy, followed by a surge of anger. She realized that throughout these months, it had always been her looking for Xu Qingfan, while Xu Qingfan never reached out to her, not even to inform her when he left. Did this mean Xu Qingfan didn’t care about her at all?

So, feeling a bit like a shy woman, Dongfang Qingling decided not to seek out Xu Qingfan this time, no matter what.

Of course, Dongfang Qingling was also afraid Xu Qingfan would find out she had been secretly cleaning his room every month, and her feminine reserve made her hesitant to face such a situation.

But while walking tonight, lost in thought, she didn’t notice her steps leading toward that familiar direction. When Dongfang Qingling realized it, she found herself in front of Xu Qingfan’s abode again. However, unlike a year ago, it was now surrounded by a thin layer of mist, ethereal, distant, and mysterious.

Dongfang Qingling had resolved not to look for Xu Qingfan until he sought her out. But unconsciously finding herself there made her wonder if passing by without visiting would be right. Besides, it had been over a year since she last saw him. What had Xu Qingfan been through during his time away? Was he still the same as she remembered?

Thinking about this, Dongfang Qingling hesitated again.

Should she look for him? Or not?

Torn, Dongfang Qingling began pacing outside Xu Qingfan’s cave dwelling.

"Junior Martial Sister Dongfang, why are you here?"

Just then, a familiar voice suddenly sounded behind Dongfang Qingling, startling her. She turned around to see Xu Qingfan quietly standing there, looking at her with his usual calm and graceful demeanor, unchanged as always. But the weariness and sadness in his eyes seemed to have deepened over the past year.

…

Seeing Dongfang Qingling looking at him strangely, Xu Qingfan felt puzzled and asked, "Junior Martial Sister Dongfang, what’s wrong?"

Hearing Xu Qingfan’s question, Dongfang Qingling finally snapped back to reality, her cheeks turning slightly red. Fortunately, it was nighttime, and Xu Qingfan didn’t have the habit of using his "Sky Eye Skill" at all times, so Dongfang Qingling had a chance to compose herself. She took a deep breath, calmed her emotions, and forced her tone back to its usual casual and playful manner before smiling and saying, "Why? Can’t I come to the back mountain? Or are you not welcoming me?"

Xu Qingfan knew Dongfang Qingling had a mischievous nature, and since he never liked arguing with people, he simply smiled and said, "Not at all, I’m more than happy to see you."

"Really? So you left for an entire year and didn’t think to let me know in advance?" Dongfang Qingling gazed intently into Xu Qingfan’s eyes, asking seriously.

Noticing Dongfang Qingling’s tone was somewhat different from usual, Xu Qingfan was slightly taken aback but still explained, "The decision to leave the mountain was sudden, and I left in a hurry, so I didn’t inform anyone. Besides, at that time, you were in seclusion preparing for a breakthrough to the Lingji Stage. How could I notify you?"

"Couldn’t you have asked someone else to tell me?" Though her tone was a bit angry, Dongfang Qingling felt a bit better after hearing Xu Qingfan’s explanation.

Xu Qingfan smiled wryly, "There are only a few people I know well on Jiuhua Mountain. Jin Qinghan is also in seclusion, and Martial Uncle Liu never leaves the ‘Herb Garden.’ If I asked your elder martial sisters to pass a message, I feared Martial Uncle Dai would find out, and you know his temper, so I had no choice."

Dongfang Qingling’s master, Dai Huajie, was very protective of his disciples and didn’t allow any of the male disciples on Jiuhua Mountain to get close, often telling them "romance is an obstacle to cultivation." If he found any male disciple trying to get close to his disciples, Martial Uncle Dai would severely reprimand them. Although Xu Qingfan seldom went out from the back mountain, he had heard of these things.

Hearing Xu Qingfan’s words, Dongfang Qingling’s expression still showed dissatisfaction, though she felt a bit better. Yet, she complained aloud, "Afraid my master would find out? You probably don’t even know where I live, do you?"

Xu Qingfan couldn’t help but feel embarrassed at Dongfang Qingling’s words, as he really didn’t know where Dongfang Qingling lived.

Seeing Xu Qingfan at a loss for words, Dongfang Qingling’s mood, which had just improved, soured again. She let out a cold snort towards Xu Qingfan, looking quite angry.

"Junior Martial Sister Dongfang, let’s go inside and talk," Xu Qingfan said helplessly.

With that, Xu Qingfan performed hand signs around the Three Element Array surrounding the cave. Under Xu Qingfan’s control, the fog in front of them wavered and then slowly parted, revealing the two wooden houses clearly before them.

Dongfang Qingling, knowing the value, noticed the change in the fog around Xu Qingfan’s cave and momentarily forgot her anger, asking, "Is this the ‘Three Element Array’? Senior Brother Xu, where did you get the array disc?"

"Exchanged for it at the market down the mountain," Xu Qingfan explained, leading Dongfang Qingling towards his room.

Seeing Xu Qingfan lead her toward what used to be Yue Qingru’s house, Dongfang Qingling asked in surprise, "Huh? Senior Brother Xu, did you change houses?"

Xu Qingfan nodded and explained, "I gave my previous house to my niece."

"Your niece? When did you have a niece?" Dongfang Qingling asked incredulously, her earlier annoyance momentarily forgotten in her surprise.

"My real niece, her name is Ting’er, and she is my only family left in this world. After I went down the mountain, I found her and brought her back to Jiuhua Mountain so she could cultivate with me," Xu Qingfan explained briefly, not wanting to elaborate on his experiences after descending the mountain.

As they talked, the two had already entered Xu Qingfan’s room.

Hearing Xu Qingfan’s words, Dongfang Qingling immediately became interested in Ting’er and asked, "So where is Ting’er? Let me see her."

"She has fallen asleep," Xu Qingfan said quietly. The mist from the "Enchanted Flower" he crushed before leaving was very potent. Even though Ting’er was different from ordinary people after being enchanted by the magic orb, she wouldn’t wake up until the next morning.

Hearing Xu Qingfan’s words, Dongfang Qingling sighed regretfully, but suddenly seemed to remember something and asked, "Senior Brother Xu, have you ever thought about letting Ting’er become my master’s disciple? It’s not proper for a young girl to always follow you, and my master knows many cultivation methods specifically for women. It would greatly benefit Ting’er’s future cultivation if she apprenticed under my master."

Upon hearing Dongfang Qingling’s suggestion, Xu Qingfan’s heart was slightly moved, but after pondering for a moment, he shook his head and said, "No, I want Ting’er to cultivate with me. After all, she is my only relative in this world."

Compared to Ting’er’s cultivation, Xu Qingfan valued Ting’er’s character and temperament more. From the moment he adopted Ting’er, Xu Qingfan decided to change her unusual character and temperament. He wasn’t comfortable with the idea of letting someone else be her master. Moreover, considering Dongfang Qingling’s demeanor and Master Uncle Dai Huajie’s domineering reputation on Jiuhua Mountain, Xu Qingfan was even more reluctant to entrust Ting’er to them.

After Xu Qingfan’s response, Dongfang Qingling was disappointed but didn’t insist. Instead, she started asking Xu Qingfan about things happening down the mountain. Dongfang Qingling had been taken in as a disciple by Dai Huajie since childhood and had never experienced the wonders of the mortal world, so she was very curious, asking one question after another. Xu Qingfan patiently answered each of her queries.

Finally, seeing that it was getting late, Dongfang Qingling reluctantly bid Xu Qingfan farewell. Xu Qingfan promised to share more stories of the outside world during their next meeting and then escorted her out of the array.

Watching Dongfang Qingling’s graceful figure gradually fade away until it disappeared, Xu Qingfan sighed softly and then turned back towards his room.

Although Xu Qingfan was somewhat old-fashioned, he wasn’t slow-witted. He realized three years ago that Dongfang Qingling had some feelings for him. Moreover, the cultivation world did not forbid marriage, and many sects even encouraged Double Cultivation between male and female cultivators. However, once a Double Cultivation relationship was established in the cultivation world, it became incredibly steadfast, lasting until death, and things like remarriage did not occur. Therefore, Xu Qingfan dared not accept Dongfang Qingling’s feelings.

Firstly, Xu Qingfan felt that Dongfang Qingling’s personality was only suited for friendship, not for lifelong companionship. If he were to find a lifelong partner, he would prefer someone gentle and serene.

Xu Qingfan understood that with his own abilities, the hope of stepping into the Condensed Core Stage in this lifetime was slim. However, Dongfang Qingling possessed exceptional talent and a bright future. He remembered that eight years ago, she had just reached the middle stage of the Inedia Stage, but now she was only a step away from the Lingji Stage and could break through at any moment. With the full support of her mentor, who had reached the Golden Core Stage, it seemed that entering the Condensed Core Stage was only a matter of time. The issue was that a cultivator at the Condensed Core Stage had three hundred and fifty more years of longevity than one at the Lingji Stage. So Xu Qingfan didn’t want to delay Dongfang Qingling’s feelings.