Volume 1 Chapter 27

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Volume 1 Chapter 27: The Pain of Loss

On the hillside of Jiuhua Mountain, a simple, elegant bamboo house sits quietly amidst a deep bamboo forest, surrounded by mist, with birds flying and insects singing, making the scene feel very distant.

But at this moment, Xu Qingfan felt only a deep sense of despair in his heart.

Inside the bamboo house.

After Xiao Huazhe examined Yue Qingru’s injuries, he had no way to help with the wound from the "Spiritual Sea Acupuncture Point." After treating Yue Qingru’s external wounds, he sighed and walked towards the front of the house, his expression filled with deep regret.

In the back of the bamboo house, only Martial Brother Xu Qingfan and Yue Qingru remained.

"Junior Brother, it was all my fault. I was too soft-hearted and did not listen to your advice. In the end, I was still tricked by him. Sigh…" Yue Qingru lay on the bed and spoke softly to Xu Qingfan, who stood at the bedside, as if each word took great effort. His voice carried an unmistakable age and despair.

His face seemed to have aged several decades in an instant. All his hair had turned white and fallen out, and wrinkles crawled across his face like vines. Even speaking sounded weak and powerless.

Looking at Yue Qingru’s current state, Xu Qingfan couldn’t help but feel a pang of sadness, and an indescribable pain spread throughout his body. He didn’t even have the desire to cry anymore; all that was left was a deep sense of despair.

Twenty years ago, his parents, who had raised him, were gone, killed by a demon beast; ten years ago, his stern yet kind master passed away, having reached the end of his life; now, would this senior brother, who treated him like a brother and father, also leave him?

Xu Qingfan hoped this was not true, but Yue Qingru’s power had been taken away, and his body was now like a normal person’s. But how could a normal person live to be a hundred and forty-five years old? Although all of Yue Qingru’s injuries had healed, Xu Qingfan could clearly feel the swift loss of life inside him, and Yue Qingru’s face and body were visibly aging rapidly.

All of this made Xu Qingfan feel a deep sense of despair.

"Big Brother, don’t worry. I will deal with that Nangong Qingshan, and I will avenge you myself," Xu Qingfan said with a calm heart, a calm that comes when one has a clear mission.

On the way to Xiao Huazhe’s cave, Yue Qingru told Xu Qingfan in bits and pieces about his match with Nangong Qingshan. At the beginning of the match, Nangong Qingshan used a voice technique to confess to Yue Qingru, saying how wrong it was for him to betray Lu Huayan and join another side, and how much he missed the happy times he had under Lu Huayan. As he became emotional, he slowly walked over to Yue Qingru, seemingly seeking his comfort.

Hearing Nangong Qingshan’s heartfelt words, Yue Qingru had already thrown Xu Qingfan’s warning aside. Without any suspicion, he was about to pat Nangong Qingshan’s shoulder to offer comfort.

Just then, an unexpected change occurred. The remorseful Nangong Qingshan tore off his false mask and revealed his wolfish ambition. A spiky blue artifact suddenly appeared and instantly pierced Yue Qingru’s "Spiritual Sea Acupuncture Point," taking away all of Yue Qingru’s powers. When Yue Qingru tried to protect himself with his artifact "Black Wood Bamboo Slip," it was caught by a net-shaped artifact that Nangong Qingshan used, and Yue Qingru lost all connection to his artifact.

Then came the scene Xu Qingfan saw when he arrived at the bottom of the sixth stone platform, where Yue Qingru was in a terrible state under Nangong Qingshan’s attack.

In fact, at that time, Yue Qingru had lost all his powers and was seriously injured, so Nangong Qingshan could have defeated him at any moment. But Nangong Qingshan didn’t do that; instead, he toyed with Yue Qingru for fun. It was only when he noticed Xu Qingfan had arrived that he completely defeated Yue Qingru. Doing this was a form of revenge against Xu Qingfan and a show of power.

So, when Xu Qingfan faced Yue Qingru now, he felt not only sadness and despair but also deep guilt. He felt that Yue Qingru’s suffering was the bitter fruit of his previous mercy toward Nangong Qingshan.

"Junior Martial Brother, don’t, don’t hurt him." To everyone’s surprise, after hearing Xu Qingfan’s words, Yue Qingru exclaimed in shock, "Master liked Martial Brother Nangong very much in life. What he is doing now is just a moment of confusion. He will surely realize his mistakes later. Besides, he has many powerful magical tools with him, so you may not be able to hurt him and might even end up getting hurt yourself."

Hearing Yue Qingru say this, Xu Qingfan silently looked at him, not expecting that even at this time, Yue Qingru still hoped for Nangong Qingshan to realize his mistakes.

Looking at Yue Qingru’s anxious eyes, Xu Qingfan sighed helplessly and said, "Alright, Senior Brother, I promise you. I will not take his life."

Seeing Yue Qingru’s expression of relief, Xu Qingfan sighed in his heart. His senior brother, with his overly kind character, always thought about others and never understood resentment.

"I will not take his life, but I will return all the pain you suffered today to him!" Xu Qingfan silently added this thought in his heart.

For Nangong Qingshan, Xu Qingfan would never forgive him. For Xu Qingfan, not every mistake can be fixed just by saying "I’m sorry."

But Xu Qingfan did not intend to share these thoughts with Yue Qingru because he did not want to make Yue Qingru worry and did not want to argue with him at this moment.

"Alright, Senior Brother, I’m going to see Martial Uncle. You should rest well here," Xu Qingfan said kindly.

After seeing Yue Qingru nod, Xu Qingfan carefully covered him with a blanket and then turned to walk toward the front room.

In the front room, Xiao Huazhe sat cross-legged, facing the sunset, with the door closed to rest his mind.

"Martial uncle," Xu Qingfan softly walked to Xiao Huazhe’s side, bowed respectfully, and asked in a low voice, "Is there truly nothing you can do for my older brother’s injury?"

Saying this, Xu Qingfan looked at Xiao Huazhe with hope, still unwilling to give up on Yue Qingru’s condition.

Xiao Huazhe slowly opened his eyes, glanced at Xu Qingfan’s hopeful expression, sighed, and then slowly said, "The spiritual sea is broken, the cultivation is ruined, the lifespan is gone, and there is no vitality left."

"Is there not even a glimmer of hope?" Although he had already expected this outcome in his heart, Xu Qingfan still felt an overwhelming darkness as he asked hoarsely.

"Take care and move on," Xiao Huazhe said slowly after a moment of silence, then closed his eyes again.

After hearing Xiao Huazhe’s words, Xu Qingfan bowed once more to Xiao Huazhe and then slowly walked towards the back room. There was his older brother, and he wanted to be with him during his last moments.

When Xu Qingfan arrived at the back room, he found that Yue Qingru was not resting; he was simply lying quietly in bed, looking out the window with a gaze full of longing.

It was uncertain if it was just Xu Qingfan’s imagination, but in the short time he had stepped away, many more wrinkles appeared on Yue Qingru’s face.

After seeing Xu Qingfan come back, Yue Qingru calmly asked, "Am I out of hope?"

Strangely, at that moment, Yue Qingru’s voice showed some strength again, much stronger than before.

"Senior brother, how can you say that? If you take good care of yourself, you will definitely recover," Xu Qingfan said with a forced smile.

"Junior brother, don’t lie to me. I know very well what my body is like now," Yue Qingru replied with a faint smile. "I probably won’t last through tonight."

Upon hearing Yue Qingru say this, Xu Qingfan fell silent. He knew he couldn’t fool Yue Qingru.

"Don’t be sad. I have lived longer than many others, and I have always done what I wanted to do. After I am gone, you, my dear junior brother, will still care for me. I feel very content. I have no regrets in this life, and I can face death calmly," Yue Qingru said to comfort him.

"Yes, senior brother." Although Xu Qingfan tried to hold back, his eyes turned red without him realizing.

"Junior brother, since we met, I have spent my days reading while you trained. Except for twenty years ago when you first joined the school and that drinking party ten years ago, we haven’t really talked. Today, please sit with me and have a good chat, okay?" Yue Qingru’s voice was filled with love.

"Okay, senior brother."

Then, the two brothers began their third long talk after twenty years, sharing their past, present, and future. Joy, sorrow, and worry flowed slowly in this conversation, full of complicated feelings.

It was unclear how much time passed, but the sky had turned completely dark. Xu Qingfan was telling Yue Qingru about the customs of the Southern Wasteland when Yue Qingru suddenly interrupted, "Junior brother, can I say a few words?"

"Senior brother, please speak."

"I am over one hundred ten years older than you. Although you are my younger brother, I have always seen you as a grandchild." Yue Qingru’s tone suddenly became a little urgent.

"Senior brother, I know. I have always regarded you as an elder." Xu Qingfan said sadly.

"Qingfan, listen to me this time. If you can reclaim Master’s belongings, then do it. If not, let it go; after all, it is just a lifeless object. Don’t risk everything for this. The same goes for your family grudges; if you can take revenge, do it. If not, let it drift away." Yue Qingru looked seriously into Xu Qingfan’s eyes and said, "You cannot always live in the past. Living well and happily is the most important thing."

Hearing Yue Qingru’s words, Xu Qingfan fell silent for a moment. Some things cannot simply be let go.

"Promise me, okay?" Seeing Xu Qingfan silent, Yue Qingru asked again.

"Alright, senior brother, I promise you." Xu Qingfan said helplessly. At that moment, what else could he say?

"That’s good, that’s good." After hearing Xu Qingfan’s promise, Yue Qingru sighed deeply and whispered to himself, as if he had set down his last worry.

"Brother, do you have anything else to say to me?"

But Yue Qingru did not respond.

"Brother? Brother?"

Yue Qingru had already closed his eyes, and despite Xu Qingfan calling him, he never opened them again.

Outside the window, the dark night sky of Jiuhua Mountain suddenly started to drizzle.

…

The next morning, the sky was clear, and the air was especially fresh after the rain.

Xu Qingfan, dressed in plain clothes, buried Yue Qingru’s body in front of their cave where they had lived together for the past ten years.

Buried here, one reason is that Yue Qingru cannot be buried in the ancestral grave on Jiuhua Mountain; the other reason is that Xu Qingfan wants his older brother to always be with him.

After placing the tombstone, Xu Qingfan knelt in front of Yue Qingru’s grave and bowed three times.

Slowly standing up, Xu Qingfan looked at the grave before him and suddenly whispered, "Suddenly blown away, resentment hard to settle, two decades with my old brother. Light mist, bamboo house, a dream from yesterday, night bed, wind and rain, a gift for the next life."

Strangely, after Yue Qingru died, Xu Qingfan felt very calm, with no sadness or grief, as if he had spent all those emotions. He only felt a hollow emptiness inside.

There is no greater sorrow than a dying heart.

"From now on, I will have no family left," Xu Qingfan said to himself.

As he spoke, Xu Qingfan’s fingers danced, and countless simple-looking Ring Flowers appeared from his fingertips. With a sweep of his hands, he tossed the Ring Flowers into the air, and they gently fell in front of Yue Qingru’s grave.

The flower rain fell, filling the sky with Ring Flowers, all pure white.

"Brother, these Ring Flowers, which you loved the most in life, will be my offering to you as your younger brother," Xu Qingfan said softly to the tombstone.

"I am sorry for your loss."

Xu Qingfan didn’t know how long he had been standing by Yue Qingru’s grave when a clear, bright voice, as sweet as the sound of metal clashing, suddenly broke the silence, filled with a slight worry.

Xu Qingfan turned to look and saw that Jin Qinghan was standing not far behind him, looking at him with concern in his eyes.

Seeing Jin Qinghan, Xu Qingfan’s cold and dark heart felt a little warmer. Yes, he might have lost all his family, but at least he still had this friend.

"Has the match started today?" Xu Qingfan asked softly. He didn’t want Jin Qinghan to worry about him, so he tried to keep his expression and tone calm.

"Your match is about to start."

"Then let’s hurry and go." Saying this, Xu Qingfan stepped forward toward the mountain.

"Wait." Jin Qinghan suddenly called out.

"What is it?" Xu Qingfan turned to ask.

"Are you really going to wear just that?" Jin Qinghan asked Xu Qingfan, looking at his plain white mourning clothes.

"Today my senior brother died; what else should I wear?" After saying this, Xu Qingfan walked away quickly toward the back mountain without looking back.

In the back mountain, only Xu Qingfan’s calm yet sincere voice echoed.

"Junior Brother Jin, thank you."