Chapter 44
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Chapter 44: Doubts
On the way back from Baligou, Zhang Cai couldn’t shake off Mr. Liu’s words. “I agreed to let Qianqian take care of Xiaolong because I wanted her to repay him for saving her. Heroic deeds leading to romantic involvement, that’s a story from legends. I never thought about it. Now that Xiaolong has recovered from his injuries, I think I’ll bring Qianqian back in a few days. It’s not right for her to stay at Brother Zhang’s place indefinitely.”
What could Zhang Cai say? His family was fundamentally different from the Liu family. Xiaolong was just a farmer, and compared to Liu Qian, a well-educated and refined girl, he indeed seemed unworthy. To the Zhang family, Liu Qian was like a golden phoenix, and without a parasol tree, how could they hope for the phoenix to stay?
Although Liu Qian truly liked Zhang Xiaolong and was willing to live with the Zhang family, who knew what their life together would be like in the future? Rather than facing potential heartache later, it might be better not to come together now. Alas, it was a pity to lose such a good daughter-in-law, and it was unfortunate for Xiaolong’s deep affection to go unfulfilled.
[TL_Note: In myths phoenixes make their nests in parasol trees]
Zhang Cai sighed continuously as he walked, his brow furrowed the entire way back to Guo Village.
At home, Zhang Xiaolong and the others were eagerly waiting, hoping Zhang Cai would bring back good news. However, seeing Zhang Cai enter with a gloomy face, they knew things hadn’t gone well. Zhang Cai went inside and sank into a chair. Zhang Xiaolong quickly poured him a glass of water. After drinking the water and resting a bit, Zhang Cai recounted everything that had happened at Mr. Liu’s house. The anxious family fell silent. Guo Sufei then asked Zhang Cai: “Should we tell Mother about this?”
Zhang Cai thought for a moment and said: “Let’s not tell her for now. Mother knows we went to Baligou. If it were good news, we’d tell her right away. Since we’re not telling her, she’ll probably guess it’s not good news. By the way, where’s Qianqian?”
Guo Sufei pointed towards the inner room and said: “When she saw you returning, the child felt shy and hid. I’ll call her out now and let her know what her father said, so she can start packing her things in advance.”
Zhang Xiaolong, standing nearby, said: “Mother, let me go call her. I don’t think Qianqian will want to go back, so there’s no need to pack her things just yet.”
Guo Sufei looked lovingly at the love-struck Zhang Xiaolong and said: “Alright, you go. Maybe Qianqian can convince her father.”
Not long after, Liu Qian followed Zhang Xiaolong out of the inner room. Her face was somewhat pale. She glanced at everyone but said nothing, quietly sitting down on a chair. The others also sat down, silently watching her. Inside, Liu Qian’s heart was in turmoil as she tried to understand her father’s intentions. Her father had always indulged her since she was young, never going against her wishes. Even when it came to choosing a husband, it had always been her decision. Countless suitors had come before, and her father had never voiced his opinion, always leaving it up to her preferences.
This time, it was indeed strange that her father opposed her decision. Could it be that he feared Uncle Zhang was deceiving him? That didn’t seem right either. Or perhaps he truly wanted her brother to get married first before considering her own marriage? Thinking about this, Liu Qian became even more troubled. Liu Kai’s standards were unusually high, and he hadn’t taken a liking to any of the girls in the nearby villages. If she had to wait for him to settle down first, wouldn’t she become an old maid?
Liu Qian looked up and saw the expectant gazes from everyone. Forcing a smile, she said: “I don’t quite understand my father’s intentions either. When he comes to pick me up in a few days, I’ll ask him properly.”
She then glanced at Zhang Xiaolong and nodded at him. Only then did a slight smile appear on Zhang Xiaolong’s face.
That night was destined to be a heavy one. No one had much of an appetite at dinner, and they quickly finished eating and cleaned up. When Guo Sufei took food to Grandmother, she asked if Zhang Cai had brought back good news. Guo Sufei was about to give a vague response when Grandmother said: “It’s alright, Sufei. I’m well aware of our family’s situation. The children are excellent, but our family’s circumstances are what they are. It’s normal for others to be concerned about it. Let the children follow their own paths. If they are meant to be part of our family, they will come to us eventually. The one who is meant to be our daughter-in-law will find their way here in due time.”
Hearing this, Guo Sufei felt a mix of emotions. She was relieved that her mother had a clearer perspective than she did, realizing that her own concern had clouded her judgment. However, she was also worried that her mother’s last wish might not be fulfilled, making her feel a bit unfilial.
After dinner, no one felt like doing any work. They chatted briefly before going to bed. Only Zhang Cai and Guo Sufei stayed in the main room, whispering and discussing for a long time before finally returning to their own room.
The inner room was unlit, and Guo Sufei climbed onto the kang in the dark. As she lay there, still thinking about the discussion with Zhang Cai, she heard Liu Qian tossing and turning, unable to sleep. She asked: “Are you thinking about what your father said?”
“Yes, Auntie,” Liu Qian replied softly.
Guo Sufei said: “Qianqian, your father does care about you. After all, you’re still young and haven’t experienced much in life. Your father has his own ideas and wants you to have a happy life. We all understand that especially considering families like ours don’t have much to offer. When your father was young, it was because of his family’s situation that he couldn’t take good care of your mother’s health, which became a lifelong regret for him. That’s why he values this so much. And most importantly, I think he wants to find you a scholarly husband. Both he and your brother are scholars, so naturally, he hopes your husband will be too. He wants you to have a life where you can recite poetry and write couplets together. As for Xiaolong, my own son, of course, I think highly of him. But our family’s financial situation wasn’t good back then, so we couldn’t afford to educate him. It was all forced by life, which family doesn’t hope for their children to have a promising future?”
“Got it, Auntie. I now vaguely understand Father’s intentions. However, deep down, I still feel that reciting poems and composing verses, enjoying the beauty of nature, is indeed blissful. Yet, a life where you fetch water while I tend the garden, you plow the fields while I weave cloth, is also a kind of happiness. When two people in a family understand each other’s hearts, with mutual respect and love, although we may be poor, we can change it with our own hands. I grew up in the countryside since I was a child, and I don’t have my mother’s health problems. Even though I haven’t done farm work since I was little, I believe that if I did, I wouldn’t be any worse than others,” Liu Qian said indignantly.
Guo Sufei smiled and said: “Qianqian, you are truly a child who never gives up. Actually, a marriage is often not just between two people. You have to integrate into a new family, adapt to their way of life, and also make them accept you. It’s not enough if only your husband accepts you. Moreover, there are many trivial matters at home, like oil, salt, soy sauce, vinegar, and other small things. Any little thing can make your life uncomfortable.”
Liu Qian replied: “Auntie, I understand all these things. When I was at home, neither father nor my brother understood household chores. I did everything. I believe I am fully prepared for these things. And… And during the time I’ve stayed here, I’ve felt a very pleasant atmosphere at home, very harmonious. I feel a sense of belonging here that I couldn’t feel at my own home. I believe I can integrate well into this family.”
Her voice grew softer as she spoke, seeming to become embarrassed.
“And, most importantly, I think Xiaolong is very good, in every way. I don’t want to miss the chance to be happy for the rest of my life just because of our family backgrounds. Actually, I’ve had my own doubts before, thinking that because Xiaolong might not be able to read we might not have much to talk about. But I’ve thought about it, I can teach Xiaolong to read, and he has agreed. I believe we will live a good life together, so you don’t have to worry about us.” Liu Qian said, her voice barely audible by the end. Thankfully, it was dark, and no one could see Liu Qian’s flushed face as she finally managed to say these words.
Guo Sufei felt very relieved listening to this and comforted Liu Qian, saying: “Qianqian, you’ve spoken your mind today, and Auntie is very happy. You’ve also seen that everyone in our family likes you a lot, not just Xiaolong. Your uncle and I sometimes see you as a daughter-in-law already, and Xiaohua and Xiaohu even want to call you sister-in-law. We will do our best to marry you into our family. Do you remember the bully in Lu Town last time, didn’t he compensate us with silver?”
Liu Qian replied: “Oh, yes, that’s right. I almost forgot about that incident. It was indeed quite a sum of silver.”
Guo Sufei said: “Just now, I talked with your uncle. If your father is truly concerned about our family’s financial situation and worries that we don’t have enough silver to ensure you a good life, we plan to cash in that promissory note. I believe the amount will surely satisfy your father.”
Liu Qian immediately objected, saying: “Auntie, we must not use that promissory note now. What if the bully has set a trap at the money exchange in Lu Town? Wouldn’t we be walking into a trap? Without absolute certainty, we must not take such risks. Otherwise, we won’t be able to live our normal lives, let alone make my father feel at ease. Besides, my father is not someone who is solely concerned about money. He must have other thoughts. Let’s wait for him to come and discuss everything.”
Guo Sufei added: “Exactly, I said the same to your uncle. But it seems like your uncle has become overly anxious, fearing that your father might take you away. That’s why he came up with this idea. When your father arrives, we’ll have a good talk with him and understand his thoughts. Anyway, I feel that if Xiaolong doesn’t marry you, he won’t be interested in other girls. Who knows, he might remain single for the rest of his life?”
Liu Qian giggled: “Auntie, you’re exaggerating. I’m not that great. Meeting Xiaolong is also our fate.”
Guo Sufei responded: “Yes, it’s destiny, but destiny is determined by heaven. Whether this fate can turn into a real family depends on people. Heaven isn’t concerned about it. Let’s sleep early, replenish our energy, and take care of our family.”
Liu Qian agreed: “Alright, Auntie, you should go to bed early too.”
Liu Qian shared all her concerns with Guo Sufei, feeling a great sense of relief. Before long, she fell asleep, her worries eased. Listening to Liu Qian’s soft snoring, Guo Sufei felt happy too. Even if this girl couldn’t become her daughter-in-law, she still wished her happiness. With these thoughts in mind, Guo Sufei drifted off to sleep as well.
In the opposite small room, Zhang Cai and Zhang Xiaolong found it difficult to fall asleep. They remained awake for some time, unsure of when they eventually drifted off.
