Chapter 9
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As we left the store and looked up at the sky, it had cleared up more than when we had left the house.
It might finally be turning into proper summer weather.
The recent string of damp days had been quite dreary, so this was a relief.
Still—
“……”
—Tsubaki’s expression as she walked, holding the torn paper bag, kept my mood from lifting.
“……I’m sorry about earlier.”
“……No, it wasn’t your fault, Kawakami-san.”
“Is that so…”
Even if it wasn’t my fault, it was true that I couldn’t stop Mishima’s outburst.
Despite our long-standing friendship, I should have managed things better…
“I should be the one apologizing…”
“Huh…? Why are you apologizing, Tsubaki?”
“From what Mishima-san said earlier, it seems my mother caused you some distress, didn’t she?”
“Well… a lot happened, that’s true…”
It’s true that my breakup with Mayuko wasn’t clean. But still…
“……It wasn’t all bad.”
“Really…?”
“Yeah. We went out together, had endless conversations…”
Each time, she had the most adorable smile. Those times were…
“……I think I was quite happy.”
“I see… If that’s the case…”
I realized Tsubaki was looking at me.
But then, she quickly averted her gaze and looked down again.
“……No, never mind.”
“It’s rare to find someone who can just say ‘okay’ to that.”
“You’re right… then…”
Her well-shaped lips moved slightly, but no words came out.
Well, I already knew what she wanted to ask.
“You want to know why Mayuko… no, why your mother and I broke up, right?”
“……Yes.”
“It’s a pretty common story, but are you okay with that?”
“……I don’t mind.”
“Alright. Well, in short, your father became our homeroom teacher in our second year of high school.
Mayuko had a change of heart and ended up marrying him. That’s how our relationship ended.”
Putting it into words, it really was just that simple.
And yet—
An empty classroom with just the two of us.
A violent thunderstorm outside the window.
Her sobbing uncontrollably.
Her shouting curses at me.
And then, the revelation of her pregnancy.
—Just remembering it made me feel nauseous.
“……I’m sorry.”
Suddenly, a faint voice reached my ears.
Before I knew it, Tsubaki was wearing an even darker expression than usual.
“So, because of me… I ruined your happy times, didn’t I?”
“……”
…She had to marry him because she got pregnant. That was an undeniable fact.
But even so…
“I don’t think you need to worry about that.”
“……Huh?”
Her long-lashed eyes widened slightly, and a small voice escaped her pale lips.
“……But didn’t you think that if I hadn’t been born, everything would have been better?”
(…Kawakami-san, “Too”, huh.)
“……At the time, I didn’t have the luxury to think that far.”
“But because my mother got pregnant with me… if that hadn’t happened…”
“Well, I have a lot of thoughts about your parents… quite a lot, actually. But it’s not like the child born should bear any guilt or responsibility.”
“……I see.”
Her voice was just a bit brighter.
…Honestly, it’s not that I have no feelings about it.
If she hadn’t gotten pregnant, we might have been able to work things out.
There was a time when I kept thinking about that.
But considering the scrutiny she must have faced before coming here, it’s not something I should add to.
Besides, even if I blame someone now, she’s already…
“……Kawakami-san, what would you like for dinner?”
“Huh? D-dinner?”
The sudden, out-of-context question made my voice crack.
Before I realized it, Tsubaki was looking at me with her head slightly tilted.
Her face was expressionless, but the darkness was gone.
“As a thank you for earlier, I’d like to make something you like for dinner.”
Was it gratitude for the clothes or for my words earlier?
Either way, it didn’t matter much. It seemed to have comforted her a bit.
“Let’s see… Maybe something with pasta.”
“Understood.”
“Oh, but please spare me from something like super spicy arrabbiata or overly sweet azuki cream pasta.”
“Fufufu, I wouldn’t do such a thing.”
Her face started to brighten.
…Good.
I thought I wouldn’t get to see her smile today.
“In that case, can we buy some ingredients on the way home?”
“Yeah, let’s do that.”
Before I knew it, a clear blue sky without a single cloud had spread above us.
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