The Experimental Log of the Crazy Lich

Chapter 28: Step-By-Step Guide Teaching You How to Make Fake Goods


“God Equipment, Yongye Scepter, the symbol of authority of the Undead. It was said to be an object Lord Yongye kept by his side and hidden within it is the reason for his overwhelming strength, but it has never appeared on the stage of history.” That’s is how Yongye Scepter was introduced in Illustrations of God Equipments by Tower of Ten Thousand Magic.


As the only Undead Emperor in recent times, the rise of Lord Yongye and his disappearance were equally mystifying. No one knows how did he rise to power just like how no one would have guessed he would have been defeated in at his strongest state. However, quite a few people reckons that his sudden rise to power might be related to this God Equipment.


“This God Equipment which have never appeared on the stage of history has had its existence questioned (By presenting the head of one who spread such rumors, one can claim 100 gold coins from the Xiluo Empire’s 7th Administrative Bureau), but there are numerous Royal Guards and followers, with me included in their midst, have once heard him mumble these words.”


“You want to obtain my power and authority? Go and find it, the object that I have put my everything into — Yongye Scepter.”


“The Emperor’s wisdom are just the ocean, deep and far. No one would have predicted the possibility of failure by the invincibility Yongye army. But he wasn’t fooled by appearances, the Soulfire in his eyes allowed him to see through the future. That seemingly ominous mumbling of his is actually his way of passing down his will for the future of the Empire without his existence.”


“Ever since his disappearance (With me included in the midst, there are still numerous high-tier undeads who refuse to beieve that their invincible Emperor would die in battle), a rumor has been spreading wildfire. ‘Only the owner of Yongye Scepter can become the successor of the Undead Emperor’ has already become the common knowledge among all intelligent undeads. If only there was really someone who obtained the scepter, then perhaps the Empire wouldn’t have ended up like that. The Emperor has already prepared the best future for the Undead Empire, but…”


“The foolish Undead Lords actually ignored the teachings of our Emperor. After his departure, they started an internal strife for their own benefits. Despite not having any legitimacy, they hoped to use violence to forcefully enshrine themselves and become the Undead Emperor of the new generation. In the end, the dream of forming a great Undead Empire bursts and the invincible Yongye army grinded itself down, its remaining members forming the Xiluo Empire.”


“Due to this historical reason, despite the authority of the country is split between 12 of its strongest Senators but it is still considered an Empire. However, we won’t allow anyone within our midst to climb up to that seat. That seat of the Emperor has been empty for over a hundred years and it is destined to remain empty, until the owner of that scepter appears — The Keeper of History, the 7th Senator of Xiluo Empire Spider Marquis, the Eternal Royal Guard of the Emperor Lionheart.”


Cough, when I saw this ‘known work of history’ written by little Lionheart, my jaw immediately drops. I really don’t how I should react to this. If I was still living and could still sweat, cold sweat, profuse sweat, waterfall sweat, Genghis Khan, I’m afraid none of it would be sufficient to explain my complicated emotions then.
TL: ?????????????? -> (?) means sweat and (????) means Genghis Khan


From a certain perspective, the joke that I made in bad humor has achieved an effect way beyond my expectations. Today, in order to make this underground world even more chaotic, I have prepared the latter half of the joke with malice.


Yongye Scepter, a meter long black wooden scepter. It may seem like wood, but it reality, its insides is filled with bone powder. It is a specially-made scepter made by mixing bone and wood together.


It was made by me personally and the blood rose carvings and ornaments on it was all in my style, my companions then would understand with one look. The scepter even has the words ‘Yongye Scepter’ which I written with Death Ice Mana which was exclusive to me. Looking at just the appearance, it is obviously an extremely high-tier item but even so, it is still far from being enough.


“The first problem we have to settle is its origin. A treasure without an origin would cause suspicions among others. Adam, sign on this document, use your Soul Imprint to sign on it.”


Looking at the document, Adam, who only fears that the world isn’t chaotic enough, gives a big laugh and happily signs his name on it.


“Adam.Han.” The fire-like words which seem to be burning wasn’t hot in the least as it quietly burns on the paper. The Soul Imprint which originates from the soul is different for everyone. It is the symbol of the identity of a Legend-rank and is entirely impossible to forge.


The name that I wrote on the scepter with that gray death ice words had the smell of death and ice. It is my Soul Imprint when I was still Lord Yongye, which adds to its authenticity.


What I wanted him to sign is a document to entrust the auction of this scepter. The one entrusted with the task is the biggest auction in the Velkastance City where all of the underground alliances are forged.


With this book of authentication, in the very least, it proves that the Yongye Scepter originates from the hands of Hero Adam.Han. This strongly shows that the origin of the God Equipment is legitimate, it is the spoils of war that Adam retrieved from Lord Yongye. It is something that Adam used his reputation to ensure that the book of authentication is real!


When word spreads out, everyone will suspect that it was Adam who hidden Yongye Scepter after defeating Lord Yongye. If so, the origin of the Yongye Scepter would seem more real with historical backing.


Cough, what is written on the document is indeed the truth. Adam did receive the scepter from me. It is just that the time when he received it, if you misunderstand it, you can’t blame me for your own mistakes…


After that, with a hand on the scepter, I infused magic into it. On the other hand, Adam grabs on to the other end of the scepter and infuses his power into it at the same time. Then, with a twist and a pull, a rotation…




When the fire and ice collides, an explosion immediately occurs and the scepter also nearly broke. Its surface is full of cracks and on one side, it is the marks of burn by a flame and on the other side, it is a gray-black color from the spread of corrosion and ice.


“Alright, this would create the damage marks when Lord Yongye and the Red Lotus Hero fought. So, if there’s anything wrong with it, they could blame it on the damage it incurred during the battle.”


But, it still looked a bit new. Thus, I threw it on the floor, jumped on it and stepped on it. Afterwards, Adam also wanted to come over and ‘help’, I immediately kicked him away with my foot.


This rascal doesn’t know how to control his strength properly and his strength is exceptional. If the scepter is left to him to play, it would immediately break immediately. Then, won’t what we did before go to waste?


“Un, the scars of history could reluctantly be said be there. Let’s just do with it.” Seeing the scepter which is full of dust and footprints, I nodded my head, satisfied. It is no longer that brand new wooden scepter. It is obviously an ancient object full of scars with just one glance, resembling an artifact.


Magaret went into deep thoughts and after hesitating for a moment, she spoke up.


“No matter how real it looks, but…”


“Yes, it is still not enough.” Of course I would know it isn’t enough. This isn’t like the authentication of artifacts in my previous world, people could only depend on their experience and knowledge to find flaws in it. This world has true gods and many kinds of divination techniques. Faking an object isn’t that easy.


However, form the very start, it was within my expectations. Adam and I were had once attained the powers of a SemiGod, the most powerful existence below true gods. Normal divination magic is ineffective on us. But on this world, there are a few powers that are still quite troublesome.


The High Priest’s Art of God’s Illumination. It allows them to ask questions to the gods that they serve. If the gods happen to be free (Even if a priest who is favored by a god uses this art, the probability of success if still less than 1/100), they could answer your question but they will only answer ‘yes’ or ‘no’.


Archmage’s Otherwordly Art of Truth. It summons a truth spirit from another world, allowing you to ask him questions. But, it can only answer ‘YES’ or ‘NO’.
TL: This yes and no is written in english, thus the caps.


There’s also the witch’s Tarot Divination and through reading the lines of fate, it still can only reply ‘truth’ or ‘false’…


From what I know, those reliable divination techniques have a common problem. They can only give a ‘yes’ and ‘no’ answer, sometimes not even replying. Also, the shorter the question, the greater the possibility of getting an answer. After divining once, the person wouldn’t be able to divine again with a period of time.


This isn’t a coincidence but a law of the world. The stronger a divination technique, the closer it is to the truth of the world, then the stronger the restrictions on it. At the same time, if you wish to get more intelligence, then the more you will expend on the path to finding out the truth, then it might make it harder for you to find out the underlying truth.


Indeed, I could pay a price and just like how I hid myself on the line of fate, I can make divination techniques ineffective on Yongye Scepter. But sometimes, unable to find a problem with something would indicate that there is a problem with it. If divination cannot be used on it, it is likely there is something wrong it. Then, the conclusion is clear, we need to make the divination techniques come up with the wrong conclusions.


Causing a 100% accuracy divination technique to come out with a wrong conclusion seems incredible? Hehe, sometimes, just because it is correct doesn’t mean its real, and just because it is real doesn’t mean its correct…


Since it can only answer ‘yes’ and ‘no’, a two-dimensional answer, then, there are a lot of things we can do with it.


I deduced that there are 3 questions that they are likely to ask. Firstly, also the main question that has to be asked, is this scepter the Yongye Scepter handmade by Lord Yongye… We don’t have to play any tricks with this one, this scepter is definitely handmade by Lord Yongye.


Then, the second most possible question is, ‘Is the secret of Lord Yongye hidden within.’


This question is simple, but within its simplicity, the importance of the answer is significant. If there is no secret hidden, then even if the scepter is real, it is as good as being a fake. I can assure that this question will be the first to be asked, and will be asked many times.


Thus, I have already written a note with the word ‘secret’ on it…


Alright, I know this seems to be a bad prank but it should be useful. After all, those dumb divination techniques will definitely be screaming ‘YES!’ ‘yes’ ‘true’


The third, ‘Is there the secret to become the Emperor of the Empire of Xiluo in the scepter/ Is it useful against those Undead Lord?’


This question is asking whether the God Equipment has value in helping to rule over the Empire of Xiluo… Alright, I wrote the little secrets of those Undead Lords and their little quirks within such as the Queen of Bone Dragon Gria sings very awfully and even snores in sleep. If you take these little secrets to threaten them and they give in to it, then naturally, it would be useful in your life in politics. Of course, the prerequisite is that you don’t get silenced first…


Truthfully, from my understanding of them, if those great evils were to give in, then you might as well just go to a human empire and tell the human king that you want to be the boss, so pass on his throne to you. The probability of that happening is much higher…


The fourth, ‘Is the secret related to why Lord Yongye is so powerful/ related to great power’


Cough ‘Study hard everyday, aim for greater heights, fight hard against mobs and try your best to level up.’ This is definitely the truth to Lord Yongye’s strength. If you don’t agree, we can discuss about it…


Alright, now that I have prepared these methods, the authenticity and importance of Yongye Scepter will spread through the entire underground world from the day the auction receives the good. It will draw the attention of all the powers, even if no one is able to use it… No, not only that, the surface world will send people over. At the very least, those Senators of Undead Xiluo Empire will all go crazy… If the Undead Empire and the underground lords were to suddenly get into a fight, then maybe the 2nd calamity could be avoided somehow just like that.


Fine, I admit that I was too positive but trying doesn’t hurt right.


“So, my first step to causing chaos in the underground world has been achieved…”


Looking at this scepter, I still feel a bit dissatisfied. I don’t think that people would be able to tell that it is a fake but to the powerful masters, sometimes unreasonable instincts are more reliable than knowledge and experience. It is almost impossible to try fooling that.


Thus, after hesitating for a moment, I said to Adam.


“Since I have already served finish my sentence and released, return my Roland Sacred Sword to me.”


“Here.” Without a second word, the fiery red Adam removed the only different color, the silver-white broken sword on his waist, and passed it to me.


Magaret who was by the side was in a daze for a moment. She seemed to have wanted to say something but the words didn’t come out.


“Aiyo, my horcrux, we haven’t seen for a long time.”


Yes, this is where my soul resides. As long as my horcrux isn’t destroyed, then a Lich is indestructible. The horcrux could take on any shape, it could even be a book or a hat.


From the secret manual in the system’s Gachapon, that Uncle Tom who came from another world once broke his soul into 7 parts and made it into 7 horcruxes…


Actually, I want to say that even though it is difficult to be killed like that, but when the soul is split into so many pieces, isn’t that fellow afraid of turning into a madman with personality disorder… Alright, perhaps he was crazy right from the start.


The horcrux of this prisoner is naturally left to the hands of the warden, Adam, and he brought it along with him everywhere. Of course, this rascal is still quite smart, at least he wasn’t dumb enough to try using my horcrux to threaten me and force to play along with his games…


Touching this broken sword, I felt a little sentimental. Back then, when I used this family heirloom to make my horcrux, it was because I shared a name with this Roland Sacred Sword and this sword who was dubbed as the ‘Indestructible Sword’ had survived thousand years without a scratch on it. But now, under the tide of fate, our country has came to an end and this indestructible sword has been ‘destroyed’.


In this moment, with my horcrux in my hand, the gray color magic around me gradually expands. Without the discomfort of being suppressed, I regained some of my powers.


“Legend-rank primary stage? If so, many things would become easier to deal with.”
TL: Primary as in the power of someone who just entered legend-rank


I rubbed at the broken edge of my sword and easily pinched out some metal fragments from the strong sword. Around the fragments, there is the pulses from the soul.


Afterwards, just like how someone scatter sesame seed on top of a biscuit, I scattered the fragments on the ‘Yongye Scepter’ then with a light stroke on it, there was a flash of light and then, sparkling gems resembling stars appears on the scepter.


The gems sparkle a bright shade of silver and star light seems to be jumping from one fragment to the other, crossing each other. If you were to take a closer look, the light seems to have its own tempo as well, just like a living being. After I embedded the fragments of my soul into it, this Yongye Scepter gained its own soul and became alive.


However, different from this broken sword which holds my soul, the person who were to wield this scepter will listen to the words of my soul and his decisions will be influenced by me. After a long time of interaction between souls, his soul might even be corrupted by mine and become my slave… Seems a little wrong, I haven’t been a demon king for very long! Alright, seems like habits accidentally…


Looking at the sight, Adam sucked in a breath of cold air. He might not have understood what I just done but he instinctively felt that this scepter has become extremely dangerous and there was something eerie about it.


But Magaret stares furiously at me. She could roughly tell what I was doing and was using her stare to express her displease. But her protest was ignored by me, as usual.


“Fine, seems like my habit kicked up again and went a little overboard. But it must be at least of this level then will the Underground Autarchs, Undead Lords and all of those experts desire it and take the initiative to jump into the eye of the storm.”


Then, I opened my mouth and swallowed the broken sword. The broken sword didn’t fall into my body comprising of bones but rather, it disappeared completely.


I have transferred the broken sword to somewhere and safe and now, it could be considered that I am finally released from my sentence.


“It is said that the trip to the headquarters of the Underground Alliance Velkastance City will take around 2 months. We have to prepare in advance. Let Annie bring the team, it is about time for her to try standing on her own feet. After all, you can’t shelter her from the storm for her whole life. Don’t worry, I will follow along and continue being the shadow and protect her.”


After finishing my piece, I turned around to leave.


“Going to Velkastance take 2 months? No, Master, you are talking about old times. There are 3 routes now and it is much faster.”


I glanced at the eager maid behind my back.


“Although I do not hold much hope, say your piece.”


“Going by normal carriage would indeed take close to 3 months but the advancement in technology has created a new and faster route. The first route only takes a second, the Dwarf’s Dimension Ripper Machine…


“… Isn’t that the teleportation portal of those suicidal Dwarves? Forget it, I don’t want to be stuck in another dimension. If you want to travel to other dimensions and become the leader of some Back Palace, go by yourself!”
TL: TL: Back Palace -> The place where all the concubines of ancient king live. Lol, a lot of dimension travelling thing (go back in time) likes to show some women go back in time and get stuck in some palace fight e.g Startling by Each Step


“The second route would only take 3 days, the rocket car of the Gnomes…”


“No, that will also only take 1 second. After 1 second, I would be exploded to the heavens. Forget it, I have already guessed what the final route would be. You don’t have to say anymore.”


But the female head maid simply propped up her glasses and secretly laughs behind her expressionless face as she follows behind the back of her master, continuing on with what she was saying.


“3 hours, the Gnome rocket, goes directly up and down. It is convenient and fast…”


“Is this very much different from the one you just said? Oh, one has wheels and the other one doesn’t? Just how much do you want my wealth by killing me? I think I have treated you quite well.”


The departure of the unreliable master and servant leaves two SemiGod behind in deep thoughts.


“Annie huh? Perhaps, what Roland said isn’t wrong. It is about time for her to give it a try. After all, at her age, we have already started adventuring with the team and running around the world.”


“I know that Annie should go out to gain some experience, but aren’t you afraid of plunging the world into chaos, you letting Roland out?”


Towards the suspicion of the Saint, the Hero Adam laughs in response.


“You probably won’t believe me when I say this, but my intuition tells me that this world might come to an end anytime and the only unknown factor is on this Lich. Do you believe me?”


Hearing this, Magaret’s face scrunches into displeasure. Then, with her eyebrows raised, her face changes into one of disdain.


“You sure believe him, I…”


She wanted to say something in disdain but Adam’s straightforward gaze towards her prevents her from saying any lies. In the end, she stomps her feet.


“Don’t look at me like this, you block of gay wood. I will believe it okay. He might be a bastard but he is cunning enough. If he can’t do it, then nobody in the world can do it!”

?? -> Literally means energy of magic. I translated it into mana and magic power in previous chapters but rather than mana, this magic normally have an attribute, like fire mage would have fire mana etc.
Normally when I say infuse magic, it can also be taken as infuse mana.

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